No matter how much you try to avoid it, crisis will always happen in marriage. I don’t think there’s such thing as ‘perfect marriage.’ A man and a woman who never had the same upbringing living together under the same roof can only be sustained through tolerance and perseverance. There will always be mistakes and misunderstanding, how a couple often responds to this, will to a large extent determine the level of crisis in the marriage.
A prolonged misunderstanding that is not sufficiently addressed by the couple is a time bomb waiting to explode. Marital crisis are caused by a number of factors: lack of common interests, career interference, lack of communication, external interference and marital infidelity, to name a few. A combination of these can lead to serious marital problems that maybe even lead to a divorce.
For a marriage to survive the test of time, some factors must be present. Let’s see some of these:
Importance of Communication:
If a couple aren’t communicating or find it difficult to communicate, that relationship isn’t going to last. The level of communication in a marriage is a determining factor in whether or not the marriage will survive. To live in peace and harmony, a couple should be able to share their dreams, goals, desires, interests and common activities they love. If you have children, you should discuss your plans for them, your home, future vacation plans etc.
Couples do not have reason not to communicate nowadays; modern technology has made it easy. You don’t have to sit face to face to communicate, with cell phones, Blackberries and other digital gadgets you can talk with your better half hundreds of miles away. Every other person you see walking, driving, sitting in the park or standing in line is using their cell phone to communicate with someone.
Sharing Common Interests:
If a couple has kids, this will be ground for common interest. Apart from kids, a couple should share their hobbies, sports and outdoor activities. A common cause of marital crisis arises when the man spends time with his pal, drinking, watching TV, talking and laughing together while the woman is left at home to take care of the kind and the house chores. It’s a potential trigger for trouble. You must be put your family interest behind your friends’. The same goes for the woman; she must not be more interested in the company of her circle of friends at the expense of her families.
Sometimes the couple’s individual careers take them to different directions. This can strain the relationship if a regular line of communication is not established. One other way to avoid crisis here is to ensure you have lots of mutual activities lined up weekly or bi-monthly.
Cheating on Your Spouse:
This is about the most explosive factor that causes fatal marital crisis often resulting in divorce. Try at all cost to avoid infidelity. Be satisfied with your spouse- couple should never you compare their better half with others. A smart husband or wife would always avoid any emotional entanglements at work or anywhere else. If they learn how to focus on their home, their mate and their family, they seldom stray. Both partners should try to spend some time with each other when they are groomed and at their best.